Building Community Through Better Relationships

Don’t Get Angry


Why not get angry? Life sucks sometimes! However, anger clouds judgment. Cloudy judgment leads to poor results. And poor results blocks progress! For an individual to improve their life experience, the life experiences of people they influence, and the life experience of people who are held close, the focus must remain on positive results and personal progress! Anger does not help. Having a clear purpose and pursuing it does!

Life Gets Complicated
Clear purpose sounds great in theory… until real life gets in the way. To often, other people have a voice in personal decisions. Relationships get weird. Conflicting personal agendas emerge. Do the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few? Or the one? What about me? What about my needs? Regardless of such difficult questions, every individuals’ values eventually reveal their true priorities. Everyone honestly knows whether their individual desires are more important than their significant other, their family members, or their employer. Some of us really are self-centered. Some of us are co-dependent. Some of us require direction. Some of us are in denial. Identify your personality flaw and embrace it. If you do not like the flaw that you embraced, then grab another one. Regardless, your personality flaws will dictate your decisions. The sooner each of us realize this, the more effective we will be in achieving our goals. Be who you are, or change! But, ongoing internal conflicts help no one.

Then, There Are Consequences
Even while determining our dominant personality traits, the world continues to spin. Anyone can choose to make the rules, break the rules, or ignore the rules. But, expecting to control all elements involving multiple individuals is a fool’s errand. A leader may be in position to influence behavior of her followers. When successful, she can determine the outcomes before they finally happen. Nevertheless, consequences are a byproduct of factors that are beyond the expected outcomes. We may or may not get what we deserve, but we will get something! Too often, anger is a default emotion when an individual is not getting the something they want. Unfortunately, the anger compounds the problem. Consequences are no longer remotely predictable, chaos ensues and more emotions wreak havoc over the situation.

To overcome anger, clearly understand the problem and determine what undesirable outcomes can be tolerated. Identify what explicit consequences can be endured and immediately work toward preserving the value in the other outcomes. Yes, there will be collateral damage. Regardless, the new objective becomes salvaging some value from the situation.

Ultimately, everyone has issues. While certain issues may distract individuals from their specific goals, they do not necessarily stop them. To avoid the emotional disruption to progress caused by anger, keep three steps at the forefront. 1) Set clear targets. 2) Fix your gaze. 3) Execute relentlessly. In life, sometimes the issues win. But, that does not mean that your individual issues will win. Practice self-awareness to understand your life’s particular complications. Explore possible remedies. Re-focus on preferred outcomes when ugly consequences emerge. Get Angry. Get Over It! Continue racing toward your individually defined purpose.

By Glenn W Hunter
Principal of Hunter & Beyond


May 26, 2015 Posted by | Better Communication, Better Person | , , , , | 3 Comments